As a wife, you need to understand why your husband is always at alert. Never a dull moment. It is as if the man is ever ready. Anytime is convenient. The reason is that, the way the mind of a man operates is different from that of the woman. A man cannot find it difficult to suspend any matter in other to turn to you for sex. For example, you would expect a man who is coming home with the bad news of business breakdowns, debt and sack letter not to even have time for sex. Right? Wrong. Even when he just heard that his mother died five minutes ago, he may come asking for sex few hours later. That may sound very odd to you. You may even question him; don’t you care about your mum? No he cares. It is just that the issues on his mind are rearranged.
You should understand as a woman that the arousal of a man is very quick, because it does not take time for him to pull the issues, challenges and worries from the shelf of his mind and replace it with another. This is possible because the mind structure of the man is is in form of compartments”. It is then easier for him to remove or replace issue with another. That is why during sexual intercourse the man does not need to clear any issue whatsoever before he is ready and go. Even when there is several unresolved issue at hand, this cannot be a hindrance to what he wants at that moment.
Once he ejaculates, he can immediately jump into another discussion or mission as though nothing just happen. While the woman may still be on the bed relaxing herself, the man is already doing another thing. Some men can rise up immediately and get dressed up to go for the next assignment on their schedules. However, the woman will not do that. While the readiness for sex in a man is very sharp and quick, the woman is slow and takes time. Therefore as a woman, or rather as a wife you need to study the body and mind structure of your husband. How he can quickly and easily switch on and off any issue and be ready to have sex. You must then be ready to dance to his tune, prepare yourself instead of engaging in other discussion that seem unnecessary to the man. If you are not sensitive to what he wants that time, and you are just busy talking to him, your whole discussion may be as if you are pouring water into a basket.
If you want to continue to have that man around, you must learn how to be short in details. Some men do not have time for long discussion because of their time and schedules. Once they are around, they want to discuss only serious and important issues and not menial ones. You are likely to miss his contribution as your discussion or explanation becomes too lengthy. He may not give relevant contribution and response to all your complains and discussion. He can just say” Well that’s ok”. And you wonder what is the relevant of “ok” in all you have said? The reason is because in his heart he is not with you. Likewise during sex, when you are not hitting the real matter the man is not with you. Therefore as a wife, you must understand the structure of the man and his mind.
Understanding the woman – The mind structure.
This is the other side of the coin. The mind structure of the woman towards sex is different. In fact it is differently different and uniquely unique from that of the man. While the mind structure of the man is in form of “compartments”, the structure of a woman’s mind is like a “storey building”. You cannot get to the last floor without passing through the first floor. Therefore, if on the first floor of her mind she keep the children school fees and rent dues there, it is impossible for the man to get to the fifth floor where sex is kept. The woman may continue to talk about an event of yesterday and at the same time joining her discussion with school fees, house rent, and her daughter’s birthday party. While the man is responding in his heart with words like” can you just round up this discussion and let’s have some fun? My body is already hot for it. Even if your body is freeze for it, you must clear those issues for her to be ready. Even though, the man is bored already the woman will continue to talk about the matter. Therefore, you need to understand the mind of the man.
For you to enjoy sexual intercourse with her, you must clear those pile of issues before she can be ready for you. You have to settle her for her to be settled for you. When a woman is not ready, you cannot enjoy her no matter your effort. One of things a woman wants from a man is communication and contribution. Conversational discussion is very crucial to the woman. However, men do not speak in detail, but women are very detailed in words. They do not speak in summary.
A man may come home and discuss the event of one week in just thirty minutes. But the woman can start her conversation from how she packed her load form the house to the motor park, and from there talk about her experience in a traffic jam, long hours journey and other stuffs. Moreover, when three hours is gone already it is like a three minutes discussion to the woman. She is so excited telling stories even if the man is slumbering at the moment. However a man must understand that this is how the woman’s mind is designed to function. Issues are not settled easily as expected. She require more time from her husband because she wants the man’s engagement in the matter.
However a man must not be too lengthy in her words. Your willingness to welcome the man might be an opportunity for you to be listened to. Allow the man (your husband) to fondle with your body even while you are discussing a serious matter with him. In addition as the husband as well you must try to find something to grasp from her mouth in other to give relevant advice and contribution. Make necessary contribution in the process while you are also consciously preparing her for the sexual act.
Women do not appreciate men whose busyness and business has taken them far or away from their affections, feelings and love-life. They always want their men to be there when they need them.
The process and the act.
Having discussed the purpose of sexual act in marriage and mind structure of both the man and the woman. We need to go on further to talk about the sexual act itself. We cannot try to dodge this aspect lest we put ourselves in the dark of the whole matter. Without any repetition of we have discussed earlier, I must still say that sexual communion in marriage begins with the general knowledge of each other’s body. The body is a slave to the mind, while the mind controls the operation. They are both like the drive and the driver. They work together to make a progress in the operation. However, this article is not focusing on oral sex or any style and posture. Whichever way is convenient for both couples is good. It has to be your agreement together.
Sometimes, making a woman ready for sexual intercourse can be tiring. Knowing that you cannot enjoy her without her readiness, you must be patient with the process. Get me right, I am not saying that every time you want to have sex together you must pass through a routine work in order to do so. No. Sexual intimacy is not a one-way traffic. Just like communication is not one way, sex is not either.
There are several other things you can do to get your woman’s attention. Nevertheless, buying a woman’s favorites must not be targeted towards sex alone. You dont have to buy a shoe in other to win your wifes affection. Telling the woman how important she is to you can be a sure way to assure her of your love. A woman needs to be assured. You can begin your communication in the living room, bedroom, kitchen, garage, in your compound and wherever convenient. Some men communicate to their wives by buying a surprise package or her favorites, and present it with a warm kiss. With a soft and sexy voice you can say I love you babe, you are the best thing that ever happen to me.” You are already preparing the room for your target.
In this area, women know how to play their game to get the man mostly. Sometimes, a woman can arouse her husband by wearing a seductive dress in order to seduce the man to her. “Seductive” is used here instead of “attractive” because the woman’s primary aim is to distract the man and cause to concentrate on her. However, such seduction is only within the wall of their marriage. Therefore, a transparent or loosed dress worn by the woman can easily catch the man’s attention and arouse him quickly. As a woman, you must study your husband to know what sexually arouse him and draw him to your side whenever you need him. Some women prefer a charming piece of music to dance with, in order to attract the man.. At that time, if the man is sexually caught up in the same mood, his sexual organ bulges out to show arousal. However, this does not mean you can grasp the woman and start to penetrate. You must study the woman’s acceptance mentally physically and emotionally. Acceptance in the actual sense may be that the woman is still considering privacy. A married woman will not like an environment full of distraction while she is ready to have sex with her husband. She wants to be assured of privacy and concentration. Any eavesdropping or interruption by the children or other members of the family may spoil the whole excitement for her. It is then important for the man to study the woman’s readiness. A normal married woman will not condone sex that is public to other eyes.
Nevertheless, while privacy is of great importance to the woman, some men are less concerned about that. Privacy or no privacy is not a barrier to their mission. Like the man, the woman must also be ready to accept the man. Once you accept the man, you can find a way to tell him what to do. Some women enjoy fondling at the beginning, before they can open up for penetration. However, the man must not be in a hurry or rush. The ejaculation may be fast and thereby forfeit the whole experience. Let it be slow and steady, considering the woman’s enjoyment as well. When men ejaculate quickly before the woman starts to enjoy the act, it leads to frustration. The woman may not be able to feel the excitement as when started. The man is quickly tired and his sexual organ (the penis) comes down.
You can control your quick ejaculation by trying to pause along the way, wait for few seconds and continue again. Always tell your wife to stop whenever you want to do so.
When you are through, I mean after ejaculation, don’t be in a hurry. Relax and discuss together. Woman like placing her head on her husband’s chest to show the sense of belonging. I hope you will find this article useful in your love-life especially in your marriage. Continue to spice up your spouse.
Olatunji Richard Martins is the CEO/ Founder of [http://www.spiceupyourtruelove.com], a site created out of passion for singles & married people who are seeking for fulfillment in their love life, relationship & home. We are committed to give you godly counsel, advice and support necessary to achieve your dreams & goals in your relationship and home.
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